Every new year begins with the same ritual. We resolve that this year will be different. This year we’re going to read 20 books, lose 20 pounds, run a marathon, and everything else we didn’t get to do last year. The resolutions that we made and didn’t accomplish, well that is the past, and this is a new year. One of the reasons we struggle each year to meet our resolution goals is that we lack vision and focus. We don’t know why we set these goals, and most importantly we don’t see the big picture. Because of that, we give up before we ever really get off the starting line. However, if we could somehow link our goals to our destination, it would be much easier to stick with the plan.
One of the biggest problems in our goal making is in how we frame it. We make goals for our present selves so that someday we can become that future self we’ve imagined us to be.
What we don’t realize is that we can never become our future selves. That’s because we can only live in the present as we move through life. We don’t understand that neither the future nor the present self is a state of being. Instead, they are states of action, best described by the things they do and don’t do.
To understand what I mean, let’s dig deeper into the characteristics that govern the present and future selves.
Present Self vs. Future Self
When we are setting goals, the present self is unsatisfied with where they’re at or what they’re doing and want to change into someone new. This new person, the future self, by contrast, is happy and content with their daily lives. That’s because they are doing the work required to see the results they desire. They don’t need to have a version of themselves to aspire too, because they can realize all their goals through their actions. They’re where they want to be, doing what they want to do. No contradiction needs to be resolved, and they are content with their lives. Nothing more and nothing less.
We can look at how these two operate to understand what I mean. The present self wants to gain muscle and a beach body; future self works out at least three times a week. The present self wants to eat healthier; future self has salads for lunch. By reframing your vision and goals from what you want to be, to what you want to do, something amazing happens. All the barriers that were once in your way immediately disappear. You realize nothing is stopping you from doing precisely those things. Most of these actions are not extraordinary or even particularly difficult. Nothing is standing in your way from reaching your potential.
The actions you take, define the person you are
How do we use this information to achieve all our goals?
The answer is quite simple actually. What’s unique about the two forms of self is their daily actions and habits. Therefore, instead of trying to become a future version of yourself, you can quickly remove any discrepancy between your present and future self. As soon as you start integrating the actions of the future self into your daily routine, you immediately bridge the gap between the person you are and the person you want to be.
If you wanted to become a writer, an avid reader, or learn to play the piano, you know what to do. Take out the pen and start writing, dust off those books and start reading, or sit in front of the piano and start practicing…because that’s exactly what the future self would be doing.
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